Cancer and Other Awful Stuff

I've been at a loss for things to write about lately, but tonight a post on Fyrchk's blog inspired me. You need to go and read and support her efforts to support finding a cure for cancer. I admire her for what she's doing with her blog, and since I have yet to contribute to her cause (and thereby get to take over her blog for a day) I will say my cancer piece here. I'm working on the duckets.

In short, it scares the shit out of me. Cancers that effect only women scare me more, for the obvious reason--because I'm a woman, and because I know women's health research is not adequately funded. KBear told a story on Fyrchk's blog that is reminiscent of so many women's stories I've heard. There's something wrong in the G-Y-N realm and doctors have no clue what it is or how to fix it, so they put band-aids (read: hormones) on cancers (probably literally as well) and hope for the best. I know so much of medicine is trial and error, but I think women's health gets the short end of this stick. I know women who have been on oral contraceptives for 10 and 15 YEARS, not because they are wanting to prevent pregnancy, because they won't stop bleeding without them. I'm sorry. That doesn't sound like FIXED to me. I digress.

Cancer has wreaked havoc upon my family in the last couple of years. I lost my aunt S. (dad's sister) and my aunt D. (mom's sister-in-law) within a year of each other. Both were in their 50's. Both died of lung cancer. Both were life-long smokers. I've noticed that people tend to put disclaimer's on their loved one's cancers. They often point out when the sufferer's own choices weren't contributory to their cancer. I have mixed feelings about this. While I'm glad that the cancer wasn't the person's "fault", so what if it was. It's still horrible suffering and agonizing to watch. And whether people made unhealthy choices or not, no one deserves the horrors of dying from cancer. I don't know, maybe it's just me.

But, considering that my aunts died of cancer that quite likely was preventable, I'm a HUGE anti-smoking person. I don't mean to offend anyone who smokes, and I certainly don't judge smokers (both of my parents smoked for more than 40 years each and it took at least 10 for them to quit for good) I really, really, really urge them to consider giving it up. My auntie had a burn in her back in the shape of a lung from the radiation. It ain't pretty people.

I celebrate as my state, county by county, goes smoke-free in bars and restaurants. Yes, I've considered what it means to business, but I enjoy these establishments and I don't want to develop respiratory problems because of smoking within them. I grew up on second-hand smoke. Now I have a choice about it and I choose to avoid it whenever I can. DC just went smoke-free last month. Whooo-hoooo!!!

So, I'm not putting a disclaimer on my aunts' cancers. They were smokers. That likely killed them. I miss them terribly and on their behalf I join Fyrchk and her supporters: FUCK CANCER!

I know that I make choices everyday that contribute to my risk factors for all kinds of horrible stuff. I'm usually more mindful of this after I have swallowed, but I'm working on it. (OK, if you did a double take on that last sentence...that's not what I meant.) I know that my being over-weight sets me up for all kinds of problems. My health is my main motivation to make changes in this area. I just get so side-tracked when it tastes so good. Does that mean I deserve to die of diabetes related complications? I don't think so. And it would suck if I did, as much as it would suck for the person who ate healthily and exercised and died of the same illness. Right?

I know that many of you readers have lost loved ones to one of these illnesses I've mentioned. I have thought of you as I've typed each of these words. I shutter at the thought of my parents getting older and of the reality that we'll all die of something. I'd prefer to go peacefully in my sleep.

These are my loved ones and those of my friends who've died of awful illnesses and whose deaths have touched my life. There's one person here who I never met, but she's touched my life through her daughter time and time again.

Sharon E., Dene E.,Toby E., Arleva E., Mickey F., Sharon M., Mark M.

Please add to the list and, if you can, support the fight for cures.

American Cancer Society
American Heart Association
American Diabetes Association
American Foundation for AIDS Research
The Women's Health Foundation

ISO Estate Sale: Cheap Car

Thanks everyone for all of the well wishes!! I'm doing better. I'm achy and my neck is my enemy at the moment. But there's no room to complain. I'm just happy to be alive.

I got the official word today. I have to buy a new car. Anybody know an old lady who wants to sell her 2 year old Honda that she only drove to the grocery store and back, with 2500 miles on it, for $7000? If you find her let me know. I'll buy it in a heartbeat. I really want to buy a bucket and drive it until the wheels fall off, but I just checked the safety ratings on the car I totaled. It pays to buy a good car and not just a cheap one. I was surprised by how safe my baby was. Best in the industry for front impact. Go figure. It sucks that I have to start a brand new car note. But I'm alive with a cut finger. I'm not complaining.

Here are some of my favorite comments this week:

Well that's ONE way to get a clean car! Damn. I told you I'd wash it for you.

I know you didn't feel like working this week, but dang!

[zzzzzzz! zzzzzzzzzzz!]

Yes, snoring. I called a certain someone from the emergency room to tell him/her about the accident and s/he fell asleep on me. Classic! To be fair, s/he had just taken meds that knock you out. S/he feels guilty. I thought it was funny. It was priceless!

Now I need to get on to the business of going back to Cali. I leave for Santa Monica on Saturday. I love my job sometimes. No complaints from me for the free trips. The conference starts on Monday, but of course we had to build in a weekend in L.A. I'll bet you anything it snows! Then I'm gonna be pissed. Well, not so much since I don't have to drive in it.

When did "not so much" become the new catch phrase? I think it belongs in the same category as "hot". That would be the say it again and I'll scream category. The thing is, as much as I hate it, I catch myself saying it--like 3 sentences ago.

I'm off to eat leftovers. There's been zero cooking for me this week.

Toodles.

How was YOUR Monday?

So, where's Lex been? Let's see. Yesterday she totaled her car 50 minutes after signing a new car insurance policy.

I let the car insurance lapse on my car for a while because I'm, well, broke. It came down to a toss up between rent and insurance after the forced move in August. I took a gamble. But it snowed Sunday in the DC area and after a very scary drive home from a dinner at my mom's place I knew I needed to fix that situation right away. I was looking for insurance companies online and I found an agent close to my house. I called to see if I could find out what time they opened Monday morning. The agent answered. It was midnight. He was at home. He said it was no problem because he was up anyway? {confused puppy dog face} I asked if he was sure and said I could call back in the morning, but he insisted so he worked up a quote for me, prepared my paperwork and told me to come in and sign the papers on the way to work in the morning.

I went in. I signed. He was great. I asked when the policy was effective. He laughed and wrote 9:16 am at the top of my policy. He joked that I have no idea how many people leave his office and total their cars 2o minutes later. I said, "No way!"

Well, WAY!!!

At 9:56 am I was going full speed (60 mph) on I-695. I am one lane over from the slow lane. As I approach the Liberty Road on ramp I see a black sports car lose control as he's getting ready to merge into the slow lane and go into a tail spin. His donuts spun right out into the traffic, right in front of me. RIGHT in front of me. I heard myself laughing at my insurance agent. There was nothing I could do. I knew I was going to plow into him...and plow into him I did. After the impact I felt my hands clenched on the steering wheel and I waited for the rest of the cars to slam into me. No other cars slammed into me. I smelled smoke and I peeled my eyes open. The smoke was coming from the air bag. Both airbags deployed. My face hurt. I was terrified to look into the rear view mirror. I was wet. There were wet pools all over my coat. I thought it was strange that my blood smelled like coffee. Oh, it was coffee. My nose hurt. I looked in the mirror. There was something running down my face. Tears. Heather ran over and asked if I was ok. She was on the phone with emergency dispatch describing everything including my state. She knew better than I did. I got out of my car and got into hers because she said my car was smoking. My knees hurt. But I could walk without pain. Good news.

I sat in her car. Police and an ambulance came. I went to the hospital. Everybody got all in a tissy when I told them I was going full speed and my airbags deployed. I cut my finger. I may have a small hairline break in my nose. I got a band-aid and a prescription for Motrin for inflammation and Flexeril for muscle relaxing. I went to the lot to get my computer out of the car. When I walked into the driveway I looked at my car and I saw the engine. All the silver stuff that used to be in front of it and around it was gone. I got my stuff out my car and signed some papers so that the other guy's insurance company could handle it. The other guy came in. He was fine. I was glad. He apologized. He was given a citation for the incident. He took responsibility for the crash although it was caused by the ice...but tell an insurance company that.

I was hungry. Daddy took me to Fuddrucker's. I almost fell asleep in my burger. Flexeril is nice. I came home. I went to sleep.

I'm stiff today and my nose hurts a little more. If you could see my car you'd understand how grateful I am to be alive.

I don't ever want to drive again, but I will, this afternoon when I pick up the rental. I won't ever drive in bad weather again, even if it costs me my job. My life is worth more. This is the 3rd accident I've had because someone else lost control in the ice. This is the 2nd such accident I've had trying to get to work in the ice. Never. Again.

I am blessed.

Idol 6--Yes, Here We Go Again

OH, GOOD LORD IN HEAVEN !!!! Why oh why do I watch American Idol every season? We're less than one hour into Season 6 and I'm already shouting at my TV, "Shut the f*ck up, already!"

Why do I take pleasure in hearing people make total fools of themselves? See, I KNOW I can't sing. Why don't they?

Who's Coming to Dinner?

I like food. All kinds of food. That should be no surprise to anyone who has read this blog for a while or watched me walk out of a room. My ass tells it all. I like good food. Great food.

I haven't had the fortune of sharing my love of all things edible with many people who share my diversified palate. It gets quite frustrating after a while. Anyone whose list of "what I don't eat" is longer than the list of "foods I love" is an absolute annoyance to me. Ex didn't eat mushrooms, Asian food, pizza, shellfish (I'll be fair, he claimed allergy), Brussels sprouts, nuts IN food or bananas. WTH?? Can you imagine how boooooring meal planning was with all these stupid restrictions?

I now keep a running list of which of my friends won't eat what. I hate that I have to do this, but I know so many picky eaters that I just know to ask up front. No mushrooms for this one, no sundried tomatoes for this one (OK who doesn't like sundried tomatoes?), no seafood here, no asparagus there, no pork for this one, add red meat to that for the next, and my personal favorite--no chicken on the bone. Oh, and no onions. I have a friend who doesn't eat onions...or mac and cheese. Ah! Don't all great meals start with onions and garlic? Oh, and I can't forget no raisins or cherries ;). It can make planning a dinner party really difficult. Maybe it's not hard for the average Jane who is going to offer a few staples that please everybody. Never mind the fact that it's the same spread they've had at every party they've been to since you actually had to cook Chex Mix. I'm no such Jane.

Here are a couple of things I keep on hand (or have on hand at the moment) that many people find objectionable: figs, dates, artichokes, sundried tomatoes, brie, every kind of nut you can think of, asparagus, anchovies, chopped clams, cremini mushrooms, shrimp, olives (black and green), all kinds of beans and chilis, and capers. I know at least one person who will turn his/her nose up to each of these. I love these foods, people. It's so hard to cook without them, to cook around them. This is great stuff!! These items are almost always in my house and I cook with them all the time. I've even mastered chopping onions so small that the onion non-eater doesn't notice.

Me? I'll try anything once. Yes, I've eaten things I don't like, but I think adults' lists of foods they hate should be much shorter than the list of foods they enjoy. Maybe I'm coo-coo?

I had a conversation with my class of adult English as a Second Language students about foods and nutrition. We talked about foods that are customary in each of their countries. My student from Central African Republic eats elephant, rhinoceros and monkey (says the palm is the best part). The student from Chad eats grasshoppers. Loves and misses them. Apparently grasshoppers are enjoyed in some parts of Algeria, Burkina Faso and Congo too. [Pausing for anyone who needs to to take a glance at a world map and catch up.] Some Haitians eat cat. And in Tanzania they drink cow blood. Now, while I said I had a diversified palate, I'm neither a vampire nor a cannibal. And yes, for me, eating monkey borders on cannibalism. (I'm not a full-fledged Darwinist, but you've got to admit that you've seem some folks whose appearance alone makes a damn good argument for man having evolved from ape.) I have however eaten chocolate covered ants and rattlesnake. And I ate blood sausage in Argentina, but it was cooked. So that doesn't count towards vampirism.

I'm not saying that we should make every meal time a Fear Factor event, but come on? What has a Brussels sprout ever done to anybody?

Is there anything I absolutely won't eat? Yes, of course. Cauliflower. It reminds me of when your body is trying to fight off strep and white blood cells collect on the back of your throat in little clusters. I'll pass. Every time.

What about you? What should I absolutely NOT serve if I invite you to dinner?